Once Was A Time

by: Zachary Hill


Once was a time I felt I didn't belong, like an alien I couldn't tell what was wrong.

Once was a time I walked as an outcast, in the shadows hiding the worlds contrast.

Once was a time when the sun never seemed to shine, I felt lost and alone like I was doing hard time.

Once was a time of great heartache and pain, always looking to the sky praying for a wash away of rain.

Once was a time I cried every night, reality was mean and I didn't know how to fight.

Once was a time I searched long and hard for a purpose, thinking I may never discover it and believing people are here to hurt us.

Long I stayed in the shadows of the night, looking for answers and praying for light.

Suddenly it hit me! Like a flash in the pan, the dawn came with it's revelation and I knew it was time to take a stand.

I sit back and reflect on a lifetime of pain, blinded by societies neurosis to the point of going insane.

To navigate the darkest night having nothing to fear but fear itself, I learned that fear isn't really all that scary and it's bad for your health.

Once was a time I stepped out of the shadows and into the light, it's warmth carressed my body like the strong arms of a loving woman holding me so tight.

Once was a time I was shown my own truth and power from my family and friends, Jesus and Buddha and the disappearing devil within.

Once was a time I looked at the world and realized that I was a resident of Earth, that it was everyone else that was crazy and accepting that led me to rebirth.

Once was a time where a lifetime of darkness became a memory, it was the moment I accepted God's Great Spirit and saw that I was my own worst enemy.

Once was a time I decided to let go of control and to ask for the things I knew in my heart were mine for the taking, I discovered my purpose and it's right here waiting.

Once was a time I truly experienced faith, it was the moment I realized what side served a better tasting cake.

When I finally had faith beyond any doubt, everything started to fall into place and my true insides were dying to get out.

Hope guided me in it's many countless and creative forms, Love cradled me through all of life's darkest storms.

But it was faith that set me free, it was the raw power of Source that finally allowed me to see.

I am not alone and I belong here, those who remain unconscious are acting in fear.

Once was a time I decided to love myself and accept the good and bad, unconditional love opened the door up and made my dreams my child and taught me to nurture them as a dad.

Once was a time when I let it all go, my eyes could finally see that it's all in perfect flow.

Once was a time I gave myself permission to look at the brightest light inside, I am sharing my story with you and this is my book.

...Once was a time I wrote and spoke these words, dancing in the sunlight so bright and smiling 'til it hurts..




If you have found your faith in love, never stop believing.
If you are still lost in the night, know that the sun will rise every day without fail.

The darkest night sets the stage for the beauty of the daylight to shine bright with all it's glory.
The day; exposing all of the things that existed during the night only now being consciously revealed for the first time.

Know that you are still there when the sun sets and things remain in place, it's just a change of contrast and a phase until the sun shines the next morning ushering in the day.

Darkness exists to teach us about all the beauty that starts at dawn, if you get lost in the night just know that the daylight will always come.



Once was a time, and now my time has come.


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I Was Shown

((Originally Hand Written: Marathon Truck Stop. Waterloo, Indiana. Wed April 4th 2012 12:52AM))




On a cool Wyoming morning heading through "Little America", I was shown.

Behind my tractor trailer steering wheel, I was shown.

John Denver serenading my eardrums and singing to my heart, I was shown.

As a child I grew up outside Chicago to parents that were unable to work out their differences, this made me want to be honest with others and always work things out, I was shown.

As an angsty and depressed teenager I watched my childhood abandonment that created rage and resentment run my emotions and eat up my spirit. I was put in the "suicide bin" and engulfed myself in darkness only to learn it's depth and despair, I was shown.

As a young man my feelings of loss continued to reign, along with new emotions of betrayal by my government and everything I was taught to aspire to be like and everything I was taught to believe, I was shown.

As part of "Generation Y" I was the end of the pre-computer generation and with that I learned to appreciate both the ways the Baby Boomers and later Generation Z have grown up. My interaction with technology of old and new has introduced me to everything I know. From books, pens and paper to keyboards, internet and word documents, I expressed myself and educated myself, I was shown.

At 14 and then again at 15 I dropped out of high school because it did not challenge me and I did not like being "put in a box", it seemed pointless. Unlike what the traditional school system offers, I took it upon myself to self educate and learn from an unbiased source, I was shown.

At 16 years of age I was told I would never make money or "go anywhere" because of leaving high school "pre-maturely". At 17 I earned my GED. At 19 I worked for the biggest chemical company in the world making more money than most college graduates twice my age. At 25 I found my life's purpose and I am actively pursuing it. I was shown.

The Great Spirit sent me to a computer so I could educate and benefit myself. The computer knowledge landed this high school drop out the chemical plant job. The chemical plant job and computer skills later placed me in a dispatching job with a trucking company which lead to an interest in travel and geography, I was shown.

In 2008 at age 21 I became a vagabond. I also started deep on my spiritual journey. Travel fueled by spirituality lead me to Reiki energy healing and to Sedona, Arizona. Sedona lead me to the "West Coast Journey 2008" which took me to all 11 western states plus the Great Plains, every National Park, mountaintops, valleys, deserts and everything in between. I was shown.

In 2009 my spiritual path lead me to becoming a karaoke DJ where I was able to express my emotions and experiences through music both as a listener and as a performer. I was shown.

My traveling that started in 2008 has continued and by the age of 24 I had been to all the major American cities, nature spots, all 48 continental states as well as Canada and Mexico. In 2011 I moved into a conversion van right out of my parent's house. The life of a van-dweller showed me how to live simply and free of rent/mortgage burdens that our system thrives and depends on. It allowed me to see every single person I love in my soul family all around the country in less than a year. I was shown.

My love life had seen a lot of action between 2009 and 2011. I had 3 relationships in that period which is unusual for me. I suppose the Universe wanted to give me what I was readily asking for and speed up the process of karmic affairs. Within these 3 relationships I experienced fear of intimacy, unrestrained intimacy, being loved, loving without reserve and both giving as well as receiving feelings of abandonment and betrayal. I endured the heartbreak and dealt it too. I danced the dance as both partners and again, I was shown.

I experienced acceptance, love, peace, intuition and spirit not only from God's creation of nature but from his greatest creation, my soul family. The ones that challenged me and walked beside me in my darkest hour. My intuitive gifts came to life like never before with help from loving mentors put on my path by Source. I was shown.

The city and country have contrasted one another as much as the west and the east and everything in between. I received my "4 year degree" in life on the road and by taking the road less traveled both on the highways and within my soul. Spiritual travel in the physical, mental and emotional realm has in one way or another, brought and taught me EVERYTHING I needed for a complete life. I was shown.

At age 25 in 2012 I became a professional truck driver. Outside of loving to travel there was no logic for this decision. Intuitively I knew I needed to do it. With a "2 year plan" tops, I obviously needed the computer knowledge, shipping/receiving and dispatcher experience and now the truck driver experience to come full circle on my employment adventures for others. I was shown.

What lies ahead? I'm a traveling artist. I write, photograph and perform musical stories. Both God and the devil have given me so much contrast on the choices that await. I had to experience the first 25 years I just shared to ready myself for the next 25. I was shown.

What did I learn in that moment while John Denver seemed to be singing to me? That morning God spoke to me in Little America, Wyoming?

I learned that I was given the gift of scripture, photographic and musical expression. I learned I had to go through all the up's and down's to treasure the gift of life. I learned that these gifts were given to me at the right moments so I could inspire my former self that I see so often within others. I learned that I came here not to drive a truck, work in an office or walk the path that was set for me by society, but to blaze my own trail where no path existed before and help others in the ways I'm called to do so through my gifts. I was shown.

Love, Hope and Faith in yourself, nature, loved ones, the unexpected kindness of strangers and most of all God's Universal Great Spirit is all you need. Embrace the darkness within until the light shines, accept your lessons, discover your purposeful gifts and pay it forward! It's all about what energy you feed.

My story is my gift to you. I hope you find a sliver or a sea of knowledge, hope and inspiration within it.

It wasn't until I asked for truth that I was shown.

-Zachary Hill 2012(C)